valentines chocolate

Written by: Sexologist, Dr. Stephen de Wit DHS, MPH, ACS
Therapist – Consultant – Speaker

With St. Patrick’s Day rapidly approaching us the luck of the Irish is in the air. While finding a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow would be amazing, so would having a great sex life. Getting lucky is not always that easy and can be rather elusive. Try these three things below to increase your chances:

– Comfort – we can often get caught up with our wants and needs…. and quite frankly that is healthy and normal. However, that can get in the way of having a great sexual experience if we are selfish. If you focus on what will make your partner most comfortable chances are your desires will have a greater chance of becoming reality.

– Take the First Step – in relationships you can get bogged down in the day to day routine of it all and build up resentment and frustration towards your partner. It only takes one person to turn that around. Take the first step, apologize, compliment them, do something nice for them, agree with them. Your sex life is a symptom of what is going on in your relationship.

– Don’t Worry About the Gold – spending quality time, having conversations, flirting, telling your partner you appreciate them and/or love them costs nothing and goes a long way. What would you rather have money or an amazing relationship with your partner and a great sex life?

Try the above three things this week and see if you strike it rich this St. Patrick’s Day!


Stephen de Wit holds a Master of Public Health and a Doctorate of Human Sexuality and as a sexuality educator, speaker and media personality, Stephen is committed to transforming the way people think and communicate about sex so they can experience the joy, pleasure, power and vulnerability of what it is to be human. Stephen is also the author of the cutting edge book “The Sexual Freedom System: Winning the Inner Game of Sex”. He is a master at creating a fun, safe, comfortable environment for people to take an honest look at their sex lives and transform what is not working.